I'm still not sure how all this happened. How did someone make a ragingly successful film franchise from a Disney ride? We're not talking a Space Mountain movie or a live-action Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, this is Pirates of the Caribbean. This is a slow boat ride through sparsely lit looping animatronics with singing. Now, however, it's one the most successful film franchises of all time. To be fair, the first "Pirates of the Caribbean" film shared very little with the Disney ride aside from the name and a couple of homage scenes, and the theme-park tie-in had very little to do with the success (see "Haunted Mansion" for more proof). It was a charming, family-friendly movie that struck a chord with audiences. It was never intended to be the first chapter in an epic fantasy trilogy. However where there is money there are studios with sequel rights. What was basically an anomaly became a blueprint from which to construct bigger and louder films, and "Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest" showed the cracks in the veneer. "Dead Man's Chest" introduced several much bigger storylines, but never got around to concluding them in a satisfactory way (even for a middle movie). Here we are at the third film, "Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End", and rather than get treated to an action-packed closing chapter full of resolution and closure "At World's End" further complicates an already busy bundle of threads waiting to be tied off with an all new set. It isn't a bad movie, but it could have been better if "Dead Man's Chest" had helped with the heavy lifting instead of staying out late to pillage and plunder. Regardless, it is no doubt destined to be an extraordinary success. This film is here-by stamped "Critic Proof".

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Previously on "Pirates of the Caribbean", our hero Jack Sparrow was dragged to the murky depths of Davy Jones' Locker by the Kraken and the used-to-be-villainous Captain Barbossa was resurrected to help rescue him. Additionally, the evil East India Trading Company is now in possession of Davy Jones' heart turning him into their weapon to be wielded. As we begin "At World's End" Elizabeth Swann, Captain Barbossa, and Will Turner are sneaking into Jabba's Palace to rescue Han Solo. Wait...that's not right. Actually the movie opens with hordes of pirates being hanged by the East India Trading Company resulting in the singing of a song that means all the pirates in the world have to gather together. The good guys are busy trying to infiltrate the bathroom of pirate lord Sao Feng (a la "Return of the Jedi") so they can get a map that will help to rescue Jack Sparrow. All the while Davy Jones, at the behest of Lord Beckett and the East India Trading Company, wreaks havoc with pirates on the high seas. As the story unfolds friends are betrayed, meetings are held, the past of Davy Jones is explored, there's talk of releasing the captured Goddess of the Sea to fight for all pirate-kind, and they set up what could be the greatest sea battle ever seen on film.

Geoffrey Rush's Barbossa makes a welcome return.

The problems I have with "At World's End" (and "Dead Man's Chest" while we're at it) start with the villains. Who are the villains? I suppose Davy Jones is a villain to some extent but the real trouble-makers are the East India Trading Company. Really? What is so bad about a trading company? If you want your villains to be a corporate conglomerate intent on dominating the sea for personal gain, suspending fundamental human rights, and murdering people in droves maybe a darker name is in order. The East India Trading Company sounds like a place I'd walk into with a box of apples and walk out with a leather hat. It doesn't send me running in fear is what I'm saying. So the name and structure of the nefarious organization is weak, surely its figurehead is a man of such terrifying physical caliber that his presence alone would break the spirit of heroes. Not so much. Lord Beckett is kind of a paunchy, short fellow in a powdered wig who opts to illustrate his malevolent intentions through subdued conversation. This is who we're rooting against; pawnbrokers lead by a wimp? At least our protagonists are strong and united in their drive to free the seven seas from the tyrannical yolk of oppression that is the EITC. Well, no actually. They're all self-centered pirates and brigands, and they spend much of their time trying to undermine each other for their own hidden agendas. There is so much betrayal in "At World's End" that I hardly knew whose side to pick, and which side was which. I eventually just decided, "Well, I suppose I want the villains to lose," which doesn't make for much cheering. The movie has some basic structural flaws and many of them can be attributed to "Dead Man's Chest". The characters waste far too much time taking meetings and trying to explain their way through the meandering plot, and not enough time swashbuckling and swinging from ropes. One of my big complaints is the monkey (which everyone seems to love). There are those that think all things can be improved with the appearance of a monkey wearing clothes and acting human. I am not one of those people. The last time I enjoyed a monkey was when one did the "Heil Hitler" salute in "Raiders of the Lost Ark". Let's stop with the monkeys.

Aside from some writing deficiencies and primate humor, "Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End" does offer some fantastic filmmaking. The movie strives to be a fantasy film bordering on mythology with some spectacular costume and set design and incredible art direction. The special effects flow so naturally into the surroundings that you'll hardly notice them at all. The big battle at the end is not quite what was promised (why gather an entire armada and all the pirates in the world if only two boats are going to fight) but it is a visual spectacle and a lot of fun to watch. Johnny Depp is very comfortable in his role as Jack Sparrow at this point, and inhabits that character effortlessly. I think his introduction scene in Davy Jones' locker went on far too long, and I grew tired of his schizophrenic hallucinating, but overall he's a great character to watch. Chow Yun-Fat and Geoffrey Rush both maul scenery playing their pirate lords, and in this setting it works very well. Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley don't do a lot for me in these movies, and this is no exception. The characters just aren't big enough to survive next to these pirate caricatures. Bill Nighy delivers another mildly-disgusting Davy Jones performance, but through his character development Davy Jones loses some of his punch. Can't anyone just be bad anymore? By far the best new pirate award goes to Keith Richards. If Keith was an actor, I'd demand for a spinoff movie, however I think if he was given much more screen time we'd be reminded that he plays guitar for a living. As it stands, bravo, Keef.

There is much to like in "Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End", but you have to be willing to forgive an awful lot as well. It's a big budget pirate movie with incredible production value, and if popcorn summer movies are your bag, this may be for you. What could have been a great movie about pirates defending their way of life ending in a fantastic sea battle is hampered with too much exposition and unfulfilling conclusions (stay after the credits for a brief epilogue). Doors are left slightly ajar for another movie, but unless it's called "Pirates of the Caribbean: Ninja Death Ray" I may wait for the DVD.

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